I am Nothing, without God
Sharing what God puts on my heart and my story to encourage and empower others to live fruitful & satisfying lives with Christ!
When my daughter was four years old I was talking to her at bedtime about God and that we accept Jesus into our hearts and she replied, "God is in everyone's heart." She listed some kids names and then said he is even in all the adults hearts. Which made me immediately think of Jeremiah 31:33 “But this is the new covenant I will make with the people of Israel on that day,” says the LORD. “I will put my instructions deep within them, and I will write them on their hearts. I will be their God, and they will be my people."
I was in awe of how kids can say such wisdom at times. It got me thinking of how they are so much more open to the spirit than most adults cause they haven't been tainted by this world. It also makes them more susceptible to hearing wrong spirits, which is why it's so important to pray with and over our children teaching them what is right.
Furthermore, it had me thinking about how people say it's human nature when they do this or that (referring to something bad) and how wrong that is. We are created in God's image so our human nature is actually pure. The true problem is when Adam and Eve ate the fruit they caused a sin nature to taint the pure human nature. But God had a plan to fix that, thankfully. Jesus came and died to cleanse the sin nature from us to make us pure again. That way the Holy Spirit could dwell within us. God is about free will so we have to acknowledge that we need Jesus to save us and ask him to be our Savior.
I used to be one of the ones after getting hurt and burnt out from the hypocrites in the church that would say, "I can be a Christian and not go to church." I hear others say it all the time too. Yes, you can be a Christian and not got to a church service. But you need to be part of the church which is being part of the body of Christ! Church isn’t about a building but about the people. God never wants us to do life alone! He wants us to be with other believers because it makes us stronger and able to do more for him!
And God made the two great lights—the greater light to rule the day and the lesser light to rule the night...Genesis 1:16
This scripture was in my devotional last night and even though I have read it dozens of times it hit me a different way last night.
The sun is the true light source while the moon just reflects the sun's light for us to see. The Holy Spirit said it's just like how God's son is the true light source and we reflect his light for others to see.
Depending on the position of the moon to the sun it shines brighter or not at all. Just as our position(relationship) with the Son will determine how much of his light we reflect.
Nine years and six days after losing my dad in a horrible vehicle accident I loss my mom in a horrific vehicle accident. I didn’t get to say good bye to either. My dad I saw just a few days prior but my mom I hadn’t gotten to see in months. She had planned on visiting and we had plans to visit also. Events like this in life can really change one’s perspective.
I have had several deep heart to heart talks with God. It has felt like it’s been one thing after another and I just can’t catch a break. So much has happened the last couple years. I try to have faith and trust in God but at times honestly it’s so hard. I started doing a devotional and journaling with it. Truly laying everything at his feet.
Recently I saw my husband in bed sleeping and such joy and peace came over me about how blessed I am. I was running errands and found myself with such joy and peace and a smile across my face. I was doing dishes and found myself with such joy and peace and even a smile though I hate doing dishes. More and more lately I find myself smiling, feeling joy and peace. It’s not something this world can give you but it’s what God can give you no matter the circumstances you are facing.
I still have moments of grief, tears, and disbelief that my mom is gone and even that my dad is gone. But I have come to a place that even though I have been through hard, painful events I can’t stay in the despair and the hurt. Instead, I will embrace what the Lord gives everlasting, unfailing love, peace, and joy in the heart.
I want to encourage you today that you don’t need to stay in the despair or hurt either. It won’t always be easy and sure there will be moments that you are overwhelmed with grieve but don’t dwell there. The Lord can and will give you overpowering peace and joy that this world can never give or take away.
Don’t be dejected and sad, for the joy of the Lord is your strength!” Nehemiah 8:10
I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world.” John 16:33
The Lord gives his people strength.
The Lord blesses them with peace. Psalm 29:11
How I can relate to this. When I focus on the negative then my life just feels like one trouble after the next. It feels relentless, a never ending stream of issue after issue. Focusing on the negative can lead you down a very dark destructive path. I know I have been there too many times.
I now try to focus on the second part of this scripture “but the Lord delivers him from them all”. No matter what troubles have come I am still here because God has gotten me through them all. God is my strength. God is my comfort. God is my healer. I am far from perfect I have moments of weakness and despair but I choose to remember all the good God has done for us and gotten us through.
No matter what the trouble you are going through right now or the next one that comes I encourage you to focus on the fact God will get you through it.
Life can throw you some curveballs at times. You have the opportunity to swing at them or not. I think it is better to swing and try to make the best at what you have been given than to wallow in self pity or anger. I am not saying you can’t take time to process what has happened. I am saying not to dwell on it.
Today, I was at Sam’s Club doing some shopping and pondering somethings that have been going on lately.
For example, last night I got some lab tests results back that wasn’t what I was expecting. I have been trying so hard to get healthier and to see several of my numbers going in the opposite direction it was quite disheartening. It didn’t make sense. Even with a few days of giving in to comfort food because honestly things have been stressful, the numbers shouldn’t be where they are. I got upset and vented to my hubby when he got home. I looked up some Tai chi videos since my doctor recommend it for exercise. I watched one that showed you some steps. Curtis asked if I was going to do it and I said not right now. About an hour later I was like you know I want to try out that one step. So I tried it out a few times.
Back to being at the store, I was walking around praying in words and in the spirit trying to get passed the anxiety/oppression I was feeling. I ended up getting a peace come over me that while I can’t do anything about what the numbers say at the moment I can work on making a better change. I have tried meal prepping before but haven’t been successful at sticking to it. If I want to make a change though for the good I need to put more effort into it. I need to seek more the Holy Spirit on what exactly to do that will work for me then stressing out reading a million different things on the internet. The Creator that made me knows me way better than anyone else including myself.
I just wanted to encourage you today to not give up God has better plans for you. He will help you and give you the peace you need to get through anything this world throws at you. All you have to do is seek him where you are at physically, mentally, & spiritually. He already knows what’s on your heart. He is also with you every where. It don’t matter if you at church, at the store, or any other place you can name. He is there and is waiting on you to just reach out.
Yesterday at church the pastor’s message was about sometimes you got to go to the desert to learn to really depend on God and learn to follow his purpose for your life. He doesn’t cause the bad to happen but he doesn’t stop it either at times for good reasons. This really struck at me and I had a realization. Two years ago today Curtis my husband suffered from two spontaneous seizures never having them before in his 40 years of life. It’s a day I will never forget. I almost lost my husband and the effects of that day had us go through a tough season in our lives. Yesterday I realized though that it started my desert trip figuratively speaking of course.
I had a bunch of my plans that I expected to happen. My plans weren’t bad they just weren’t God’s plans. I kept trying to do things with my own determination and strength. It was exhausting; physically, mentally, and spiritually. In God’s plans, you can have peace and rest. During my desert time to start with things got worse because in many areas I was still trying to do things on my own and not fully trust God. When I ended my rebellious independence six months into my desert stay and put all my dependence on God, I had a peace that even though in the natural things didn’t look like they could ever possibly work out in a good way God was going to fulfill his promises.
And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them. Romans 8:28 NLT
For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. Jeremiah 29:11
I stepped out of my comfort zone many times following God’s lead and I am so grateful I did. His plans really are better than mine. He made way after way taking negative circumstances and turning them to positive. This last year and half has had ups and downs however, it’s been an eye opening and interesting journey. I found God’s purpose in my life and it was a desire I had has a kid that I forgot about. I even started a business venture that is slowly growing where others I had tried in the past all failed to even really launch at all. Curtis’s health over the last couple months has been improving greatly. I got my husband back and the kids got their daddy back.
I share this as an encouragement to others that despite what the natural may look like God has good plans for you. Put your dependance on him. Seek his direction on what to do. Follow his guidance even if naturally it seems crazy. He will not lead you astray. He will be there with you always cause he doesn’t leave or forsake his children. He is a faithful daddy.
I was riding in the vehicle with my mom while it was pouring rain and crazy drivers on and off. I kept dozing off due to lack of sleep. We were driving from Tennessee to Florida. Fear started to creep in as we got closer to other vehicles and had a few near misses. Then suddenly I was reminded that God gave me another book title and idea. I had not even started writing it yet. If he tells you to do something he will enable you to complete it. I calmed down and knew we would make it home. It’s just like when Jesus said to go to other side then went to sleep in the boat awhile it’s storming. He wasn’t concerned cause he knew God had plans for him on the other side. We may have had a few sketch adrenaline pumping moments but you know what happened? We made it back safe. If God has told you something rest in his peace and promise that he will get you to the other side no matter what the storm looks like.
I love how God gives us different perspectives/revelations depending on the season we are in.
Years ago I heard a song that said “He gives and takes away" and I remember getting angry at it. To me at the time it sounded like it was saying God will give you something then just take it away to be mean. I wrote a post ranting about that he only takes away if you ask him too.
I recently heard the song again and couldn’t help but smile because I have a different outlook on it now. God gives good things he doesn’t take the good things away.
James 1:17 Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change.
For example: he doesn’t take a loved one cause he needed an angel.
However at times God does take things away. He takes away our sins, shame, guilt, pain, brokenness, and such when we ask him.
John 1:29 "The next day he saw Jesus coming toward him, and said, “Behold, the Lamb of God, who takes away the sin of the world!"
Psalm 34: 17-18 When the righteous cry for help, the Lord hears and delivers them out of all their troubles. The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit. Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but the Lord delivers him out of them all.
I also believe that because he sees the whole film of our lives and not just a few clips he takes away things that aren’t the best for us.
For example: maybe a job opportunity that in the moment sounds amazing or one feels is their only option. When in reality it’s truly not the best thing for the person in the long run. I have been there several times for myself and my husband and I can say in the moment it was so disappointing. As time went on though we learned that it was a blessing it was taken way because there was something way better for us.
Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.
We have to depend on God for everything. We have to trust him to give us good and take away what is not good.
God is so faithful, amazing, & loving. Our one place has HOA fees due every year, last year we just couldn’t pay them with everything that was happening. We got a little more in our tax refund this year since neither of us made as much last year so was going to use that to get it up to date. I had wrote our HOA last year and straight up told them we couldn’t afford it. I used to be on the board so they know us and we’re understanding telling us ok. That was the last I had heard of it. I email yesterday to ask how much exactly we owe since I know there are late fees and such. I was in awe of the response I received someone anonymously paid for our fees last year.
It reminded me of the lyrics of the song Waymaker; “Even when I don't see it, You're working” He made a way a year ago that we didn’t even know about. I want to encourage you today that to trust God to make the way even when all the things around you look and feel like it will not work out He will make a way. He never stops working. He is a faithful God that keeps His promises. They may not end up how you expected it but trust me His ways are always better.
If it wasn't for God I would not be here. Seems cliche but it's the complete truth. I have come close to death a few times, I am a living testimony to God. I am far from perfect. I don't have all the answers. I do feel like God wants me to share words of encouragement and share the testimonies (stories) of my life. I pray that all that read what I write are encouraged and empowered to not give up, no matter what this life throws at you, and to seek God for wisdom.